No. It’s just a word, but why is it that we are so afraid to say it? Whether it’s psychological or the fact of being a people pleaser like me it’s easier to say yes and make everyone happy which only leads to you being unhappy because now you have to do something you don’t want to do.
Saying yes to too many things is counter productive because once our plates become too full, things start to slip. Building fences to help us feel comfortable saying no is a good thing and something that will help you to be successful.
Things you should say yes to : things that make you happy or you enjoy, that advance your career path, and that won’t distract us from reaching our goals.
Here are some things to keep in mind when you’re considering making a commitment to someone.
- Set your boundaries beforehand & stick to them.
- If it takes your time and it doesn’t benefit you personally or professionally say no.
- Don’t be afraid to create some white space on your calendar.
- Accept people’s reactions and move on.
- Have a solid honest reason, don’t fall down the rabbit hole of excuses.
- Take time to answer if you need it. i.e. “Let me think about it”.
- Thank them for thinking of you or offering.
Learning to say no will help you avoid resentment. Most of the time if you’re honest and upfront with someone about the way you feel they will understand. If you need to practice saying no get in front of a mirror. Learning to say no was very hard for me, but I can’t tell you how much happier I am now that I have learned. I have time to do things that I enjoy and that help me to learn and grow as a person. Saying no doesn’t make you mean and learning the reasons you say no is important as well. It will allow you to live in a more positive state of mind where you don’t dread commitments or complain the entire time you’re doing it.
DON’T BE AFRAID TO DO THINGS FOR YOURSELF. IT’S THE ONLY WAY YOU WILL BE HAPPINESS.